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"I know it's autumn because last night, when I was on the hunt, the blood of the vagrant I feasted on tasted like Pumpkin Spice."
Follow CONAN writer Rob Kutner @ApocalypseHow
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"Ben & Jerry's is suing a porn company. I hate it when my two favorite things to binge on aren't getting along."
Follow Conan @ConanOBrien
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19 years ago today Late Night with Conan O'Brien debuted. And I have been riding the Poon Tang Train ever since #lucky #greatful
Follow Andy @Andy_Richter
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"Today has been 49% Skyrim, 39% football, and 12% beer. This tweet should be my U.S. passport."
Follow CONAN writer Andrés du Bouchet @dubouchet
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"Hi. I'm Carl Hung." (Carl Jung making a Freudian slip)
Follow CONAN writer Josh Comers @joshcomers
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"Elvis' bible sold at auction for $94,000. You can tell it's Elvis' because he underlined all the verses about karate & Vegas."
Follow CONAN writer Jesse Popp @jessepopp
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"Shouldn't have bought my car off Etsy."
Follow CONAN writer Dan Cronin @croninwhocares
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"I know it's autumn because last night, when I was on the hunt, the blood of the vagrant I feasted on tasted like Pumpkin Spice."
Follow CONAN writer Rob Kutner @ApocalypseHow
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"Still jailbait to tortoises."
Follow CONAN writer Jose Arroyo @seethingwithjoy
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"The Internet is a great place to enjoy a quiet moment of self-projection."
Follow CONAN writer Todd Levin @toddlevin
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