On the last episode of "Mad Men":
- Men in suits smirk while women in bras made out of steel scaffolding teeter precariously on stilettos.
- Don Draper says "no" 75 times.
- Various characters briefly suspect the American Dream might not be what it's cracked up to be.
- Shiny vintage eyewear inspires hordes of present-day hipsters to click on over to RetroDorkSpecs.com.
- Betty doesn't smile, because smiling makes you fat.
- Unfiltered cigarettes are lit, then sucked and finally stabbed out.
- No one talks about their feelings, because talking about feelings hasn't been invented yet.
- Omens are foreshadowed and symbolism is symbolic. Something or other represents death.
- Joan dispenses motherly advice from behind her iconic Rubenesque bosom.
- Fedora on. Fedora off. Fedora on. Fedora off.
- Don Draper makes a face like his lower intestines are full of spackle.
- Advertising is the sexiest, most exciting occupation in the history of human industry.
- Peggy is liberated from ever being happy.
- An obscure "golden oldie" is played that you will buy on iTunes.
- Dreams are crushed. Hopes thwarted. Happiness smothered.
- This smug jackass says something thoughtless and selfish and then bats his long ladylashes.
- Corks pop. Glasses clink. Liquor pours. There is much swirling.
- A man sexually harasses a woman. Everybody laughs.
- No one in the 1960s realizes that everybody in 2012 is watching, and judging.
- Roger Sterling cracks a joke and everyone briefly forgives him for being an alcoholic sociopath.
