Ashton Kutcher Is Drinking Real Booze On “The Ranch”

November 17, 2016

All the drinking Ashton does, on and off the set, might explain how he accidentally broke Sam Elliott's finger.

TranscriptCONAN: THERE'S A LOT OF DRINKING IN THE SHOW, A FAIR AMOUNT OF DRINKING NOT SHOW AND THERE'S A BAR. WHENEVER WE DO A DRINKING THING HERE ON THE SHOW AND WE'RE DOING A SKETCH, THEY ALWAYS PUT ICE TEA, LOOKS LIKE WHISKEY. IS THAT WHAT YOU DO? ASHTON: WE DRINK. CONAN: YOU DRINK FOR REAL? ASHTON: NO, WE FULLY, LIKE, WE DRINK. ON FRIDAYS, IT'S -- WE DRINK. THE BAD THING IS, LIKE, IF SOMEBODY SCREWS UP THE SCENE AND THEN YOU GOT TO DO IT AGAIN AND SOMEBODY SCREWS IT UP AGAIN AND YOU GOT TO DO IT AGAIN AND WHEN YOU GET TO TAKE THREE OR FOUR, YOU'RE SCREWING IT UP BECAUSE YOU'RE DRUNK AND YOU HAVE TO DRINK MORE AND WE HAVEN'T FIGURED A WAY OUT OF THAT BOX YET. BUT IT'S ACTUALLY REALLY FUN. WE DO DRINK. WE HAVE A GOOD TIME. BUT -- LIKE YOU MENTIONED, THE SHOW IS LIKE A COUNTRY SONG TURNED INTO A SHOW. IF YOU IMAGINE A COUNTRY SONG TURNED INTO A SHOW, THAT'S OUR VISION. WE HAVE KICK ASS ACTORS THAT YOU WOULD NEVER IMAGINE GETTING AND I GET TO WORK WITH SAM ELLIOTT EVERY WEEK. HE'S LIKE A REAL COWBOY. HE'S LIKE THE REAL DEAL. CONAN: THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT PLAY COWBOYS. HE LOOKS LIKE THE REAL THING, HE WOULD REALLY BE THAT GUY. ASHTON: HE ACTUALLY IS. HE'S FULLY INTIMIDATING. THE FIRST TIME I MET HIM I THOUGHT HE COULD BE MY DAD BECAUSE HE COULD KICK MY ASS. THAT'S A THING BECAUSE YOUR DAD CAN ALWAYS BEAT YOU UP. WE WERE SHOOTING A SCENE TOGETHER AND I THREW A FOOTBALL AT HIM AND HE WASN'T WATCHING AND IT BROKE HIS FINGER AND HE LITERALLY GOT UP AND RUBBED DIRT IN IT. HE RUBBED DIRT IN IT AND HE'S LIKE, LET'S SHOOT. I WAS LIKE, WHOA! I WANT TO BE A MAN LIKE THAT SO BAD. CONAN: A MAN WITH NO KNOWLEDGE OF MEDICAL PRACTICE. [LAUGHTER] ASHTON: HE RUBBED DIRT IN IT AND HE SCOTCH TAPED IT. AND THEN WE SHOT AND WE ACTUALLY WROTE IT IN, LIKE HIS HAND GOT TRAPPED IN THE TAILGATE BUT REALLY I BROKE IT WITH A FOOTBALL. ANDY: WHAT IS THE DIRT FOR? DID HE GIVE A RATIONALE FOR RUBBING DIRT IN IT? ASHTON: I DON'T KNOW. I JUST TRUSTED IT. YOU DON'T QUESTION A MAN WITH A MUSTACHE LIKE THAT. ANDY: I WOULD ASK HIM. CONAN: YOU DON'T ASK SAM ELLIOTT WHY HE'S DOING WHAT HE'S DOING. ASHTON: HE GOT UP AND LOOKED AT IT LIKE IT WAS THE PROPER MEDICAL TREATMENT AND HE RUBBED IT IN AND HE WAS BETTER. CONAN: TWO DAYS LATER, THEY TOOK OFF THE HAND. ASHTON: IT WAS SO BAD ASS. CONAN: DO YOU HAVE -- I'M CURIOUS, YOU'VE DONE SOME INTERNATIONAL PRESS FOR THIS SHOW. ASHTON: WE WENT TO ARGENTINA. CONAN: I WOULD THINK, NOW, THAT'S GOT TO BE FUN TO DO AN INTERNATIONAL PRESS TOUR. ASHTON: IT IS. FOR NETFLIX, GIVEN THAT IT'S WORLDWIDE, YOU GET TO GO TO THESE CRAZY MARKETS TO OPEN THESE THINGS UP. DANNY AND I WENT AND PER OUR DRINK WHEN YOU DRINK, WE'RE IN ARGENTINA AND WE'RE LIKE, OH, THE MALBEC IS FLOWING, RIGHT? IT'S REALLY HAPPENING DOWN THERE. AND SO LIKE -- IT'S US AND A BUNCH OF YOUNG KIDS ON THEIR FIRST SHOW AND THIS AND THAT SO AT ABOUT LUNCH, DANNY AND I START DRINKING. WE HAVE OUR 10,000 HOUR MALCOLM GLADWELL AMOUNT THAT WE CAN DO THE INTERVIEW ON AUTOPILOT AND WE START DRINKING ROSE AT LUNCH AND MALBEC AND THE KIDS ARE TRYING TO KEEP UP AND THEY COULDN'T KEEP UP. CONAN: BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN ON TELEVISION AND FILM FOR 20 YEARS. ASHTON: WE'RE FUNCTIONING ALCOHOLS. WE CAN START DRINKING AT NOON AND POWER THROUGH. CONAN: YOU'RE DRUNK NOW. ASHTON: I STARTED DRINKING SCOTCH AN HOUR AGO.

Ashton Kutcher

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