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Sex Goals (w/ Akeem Woods)

Friday, August 9, 2024
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About this Episode

Comedian and "ho-fessional" Akeem Woods joins Nicole to share his crazy sexcapades. He tells the story about his first Pride parade where he hooked up with a dozen guys in a single day, his experiences having sex with pornstars, accidentally attending an orgy, and having sex with a stranger in a Staples bathroom. He looks back on the time he was still in the closet and made a MySpace account for his fake girlfriend. Nicole gets fisted.

Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

Follow Nicole Byer: 

Twitter: @nicolebyer

Instagram: @nicolebyer

Merch: podswag.com/dateme

Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

More Episodes

  1. Friday, September 13, 2024

    Booty Call Horror Story (w/ Jameela Jamil)

    Actress Jameela Jamil (The Good Place) joins Nicole to share her most horrifying booty call story. They dive into the wild pressure women face to be sexy, why so many play it small for men, and how the relentless pursuit of the 'bad boy' often leads to heartbreak—and HPV.

    Originally aired 09/06/2018.

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  2. Thursday, September 12, 2024

    A lil update from Nicole

    We’re taking a short hiatus, but don’t worry—we’ll be back soon with brand new episodes, including more video podcasts! In the meantime, I’m re-releasing some of my all-time favorite episodes of the podcast, completely ad-free.

    Stay tuned for updates and all the latest news by following me on Instagram @nicolebyer. We can’t wait to share what’s coming up next with you!

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  3. Friday, September 6, 2024

    Dating Michael Jordan, Larry David, and a $6K Dating App Fail (w/ Garcelle Beauvais)

    Actress Garcelle Beauvais (The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills) joins Nicole to discuss dating the likes of Michael Jordan, Larry David, and Eddie Murphy. She shares her experience working at a Playboy club under a fake ID, and the time she accidentally spent $6,000 on a dating app, without landing a single date. Nicole and Garcelle fantasize about a world with Yelp-style reviews for dating. 

     

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Merch: podswag.com/dateme

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  4. Friday, August 30, 2024

    Dating Scraps (w/ Riki Lindhome)

    Comedian Riki Lindhome (Garfunkel and Oates, AfrAId) joins Nicole to discuss her harrowing fertility journey, dating someone new just two weeks before her baby was due, and what it means to "soft-partner" or date a "scrap." Meanwhile, a man tries to move into Nicole's house, leading her to seek relationship advice from WikiHow.

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Merch: podswag.com/dateme

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  5. Friday, August 23, 2024

    Orgasmic Meditation (w/ Chloe Fineman)

    Comedian and actress Chloe Fineman (SNL) joins Nicole to discuss orgasmic meditation and the strange men behind the practice. She shares stories of attending a “slutty” theater school where her friends ended up in a crazy gangbang, dating a 700-pound man who used meth to lose weight, and dating another guy with "school shooter vibes." Chloe also talks about the most ridiculous arguments that have led to her breakups and offers advice on the best dating app.

     

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Merch: podswag.com/dateme

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  6. Friday, August 16, 2024

    When Your Dad’s a Movie Icon (w/ Sophia Stallone)

    Sophia Stallone (The Family Stallone) shares what it's like to date when your dad is Sylvester Stallone. Sophia recounts cringey dates where the guy was more interested in meeting Rocky than getting to know her, the challenges of navigating her dad’s overprotective nature, and how she’s worked to overcome the anxieties that come with dating in the spotlight. Nicole and Sophia also reminisce about being dummies on the set of Are You Smarter Than a Celebrity. 

     

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Merch: podswag.com/dateme

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  7. Friday, August 9, 2024

    Sex Goals (w/ Akeem Woods)

    Comedian and "ho-fessional" Akeem Woods joins Nicole to share his crazy sexcapades. He tells the story about his first Pride parade where he hooked up with a dozen guys in a single day, his experiences having sex with pornstars, accidentally attending an orgy, and having sex with a stranger in a Staples bathroom. He looks back on the time he was still in the closet and made a MySpace account for his fake girlfriend. Nicole gets fisted.

     

    Write to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer: 

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Merch: podswag.com/dateme

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  8. Friday, August 2, 2024

    Don't Break Up Like This! (w/ Ryan Beck)

    Comedian Ryan Beck (Girl Code) joins Nicole to discuss the worst places to be broken up with and debate when it’s acceptable to end a relationship over text. Nicole shares her experiences with threesome requests at meet & greets and the time she and her friend hooked up with long-lost brothers on a set of bunk beds.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer:

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  9. Friday, July 26, 2024

    Modelling on OnlyFans (w/ Luenell)

    Comedian Luenell (Borat, Hacks) joins Nicole to discuss the decision that led her to start an OnlyFans, dating a man who slid into her DMs, and her experience robbing $50,000 from a bank.

     

    Follow Nicole Byer:

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  10. Friday, July 19, 2024

    Forget About the Dating "Icks" (w/ Boman Martinez-Reid)

    Actor/TikToker Boman Martinez-Reid (@Bomanizer) joins Nicole to discuss the pitfalls of launching your relationship on social media, witnessing his ex compete on a TV dating show and become a fan favorite, and his advice on why we should all forget about the "icks" when dating. Meanwhile, Nicole has started bargaining with her house spiders.

    Got a dirty message for Nicole? Write it to whywontyoudatemepodcast@gmail.com for a chance to have it read on-air.

    Follow Nicole Byer:

    Twitter: @nicolebyer

    Instagram: @nicolebyer

    Nicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

View All
Nicole Byer
host

Nicole Byer

Nicole Byer is an actress, comedian, and writer. She hosts the Netflix baking show "Nailed It" and has a sitcom loosely based on her life streaming on Facebook Watch, "Loosely Exactly Nicole." She hosts the podcast "Why Won't You Date Me" and recently starred on the short-lived Fox sketch show "Party Over Here." You've also seen her on MTV's "Girl Code," "30 Rock," "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon," "Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates," "@Midnight," Adult Swim, "Chelsea Lately," "Transparent," and "Lady Dynamite." She co-wrote and starred in the "Pursuit of Sexiness," which Variety named a web series to watch and was featured as a Time Out LA comic to watch in 2015. She’s also been featured in Cosmopolitan, Ladies Home Journal, Elle, and Ebony.

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