Jodie wasn't sure Jason was self-pleasuring correctly, but Jason assured her that he's a complete expert.
Transcript:
Conan: I have to say, we talk to a will the of people, they have a new show, there's a lot of buzz, THE buzz on "orange is the new black" is off the hook. People -- and off the hook is a phrase that -- Jason Biggs: Yeah. What does it mean? Conan: I don't know. It's so new. Jason Biggs: It sounds very cool. I imagine it's a compliment. Conan: I just came up with it right now. andy: in the old days there was a hook they used to hang crappy shows on. This one is not on that hook. Jason Biggs: So, thank you? Conan: I think. So your show really raises the roof, I think. No, I have become addicted to it, my wife is addicted to it. I've talked to so many people who are talking about the show. What's cool is you get realy -- you get some neat directors. Jason Biggs: We've had some incredible people come through. Jodie Foster probably the first person to come to mind. Conan: she directed an episode? Jason Biggs: She directed an episode, for me, I had some interesting stuff to do, I my character was researching this thing calling edge -- called edging which is where you essentially masturbate but you don't come to completion, you basically -- it involves -- it involves a strategically placed digit and then you don't -- anyway my point is -- Conan: what's the point. I saw the episode but I don't remember what the component is of trying to do that to yourself and not actually get the fun part? Jason Biggs: Conan, listen, you're speaking my song, I have no idea -- Conan: that's a real bad song. Jason Biggs: I honestly have no idea. I imagine it has something to do with, you know, building it up, you know, so it's -- Conan: let's -- this is not the Internet. Jason Biggs: Let's just say I'm glad my legs are crossed right now. This all had to be done in front of jodie. Conan: you had to simulate the act in front of her. Jason Biggs: And I could tell it was awkward for her. She's amazing, she's direct sod many thing, she's a world class actress, THE whole thing. She was nervous coming in, she's giving me direction, she was like, I don't know Jason, should you be doing it more? Less? Faster? Harder? She was really, it was awkward, I was like, foster, don't worry, I got this. Conan: foster. Jason Biggs: Foster. Conan: what a creep. Hey, foster, I got this Jason Biggs: I made a career of this, babe, relax. You go back to winning Oscars, I'll handle this. Conan: little thing called "American pie." I have to ask you, the "American pie" movie are out there, running constantly. Do you get recognized around the world for it? You must. There's probably not a country you can go to where they don't know you. andy: or bring a pie to your table. Jason Biggs: There have been some reatpri -- pretty random encounters in places and situations. I was recently in turkey and -- it's crazy. We came into the country via boat but we -- Conan: who were you with? Jason Biggs: I was with my wife and then my sister-in-law and brother-in-law, WE came in via boat but for whatever reason we didn't get our passports stamped properly to come into the country and then we flew out of the country. My in-laws left first. They're leaving the airport and they are getting their passports checked and there's no stamps. They are taken to, like, a holding cell in Istanbul airport where they are detained, they're getting in all sorts of trouble, like it's all shady. Andy: that's scary. Jason Biggs: They're calling me and my wife we're supposed to leave the next day, they said, you need to handle this, you don't have a stamp in your passport, you're like, you getter get on this. We go down to the harbor where we came in. And now we're like trying to talk to the harbor master and -- I've never wanted to be recognized so much in my life. I was literally like, we're trying to talk to these guys and they're so scary looking and they're like, you don't have stamp on your pass abort, and clearly they wanted money, I didn't want to give them money. I was literally like, hat off, sunglasses off, I was like looking for a tie to [Beep] in front of them. -- a pie to [Beep] in front of them. [Applause] Conan: that pie, can I borrow that? Oh! I've been doing this a long time but I've never seen a better place to go to commercial than right now.